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Aim for alignment, not agreement

(November 26, 2024 Newsletter)

Last week I participated in a workshop on team coaching using the Immunity to Change framework.

  • It’s a delicate dance to get a group of executives or managers to choose an improvement goal together and redesign how to interact with each other.

  • And yet, once a team commits to the process, it can be a powerful tool for updating long-standing and unhelpful patterns.


When discussing with the other coaches in the course how we get groups to agree and move on, one chimed in to remind us that we’re aiming for alignment, not agreement. Aha.

  • As Adam Grant puts it so concisely, “Agreement is taking the same path. Alignment is heading in the same direction.”


Why it matters


We waste a lot of time aiming for agreement when alignment is sufficient – and maybe even preferable. Alignment is looser and more nimble, since getting to consensus can be cumbersome and unnecessary.

  • When team members are each responsible for their own outcomes, they don’t all need to be doing the same thing to reach their collective goals.

  • All the more so, the ways in which they’re contributing to and holding the team back are different, so they don’t all need to agree to making the same changes.


Simply, aiming for alignment can make decision making processes go faster and smoother.


Shifting your focus


So what needs to change, if your team is bogged down by disagreements?

  1. Shift your mindset: Focus on clarifying your shared values and goals. For example, mutual respect and generosity of spirit could be key values. Define together, as a team, what they look like in practice so everyone’s on the same page. Everyone needs to be bought in on the same WHY, not necessarily the same HOW.

  2. Shift your yardstick: From there, you should be concerned with keeping everyone coordinated and updated. The team’s work should be complementary and additive. Not everyone needs to be equally enthusiastic about each piece of the puzzle and not everyone needs to be best friends to accomplish exciting things together.

  3. Shift your habits: People need to know how their work fits in with the other pieces, and you need to make sure that no one is about to bump into anyone else. How does that change the way you run meetings and connect with each team member? Develop a system for updating each other that doesn’t involve meetings where everyone goes around and says what they’re working on (yawn). Can folks commit to writing and reading updates in advance so time in meeting is spent on meaty discussion? The upside will be invaluable, but it means that they need meeting-free time to not only get their work done but update each other and come prepared.


Final thought: Someone in the team coaching course said they love the question “Can you live with it?” I will be incorporating it and gift it to you, as well.

 

The Coaching Corner


What kind of notes do you take?


Having a system for recording the important points that come up in meetings is crucial. I’ve been using the same system for years and am thinking that it might be time to change it up.


Of course, your goals should be at the center of your note taking system – if what’s important to you is shared accountability, you’ll want a doc you and your team member can both access and edit. If, instead, what’s important is privacy, keep them separate but make sure you’ve agreed to the bottom line.


If you tend to write down every word, practice writing less so you can keep your attention on the other person. If you’re disorganized, practice writing more so you keep a better log. Or you could experiment with AI notetaking tools to see what happens if you outsource the task and free up your hands and attention. If you use one you love, let me know which!

 

Recommendations


“How to Solve Problems” – two quick visuals about how teams can problem solve more effectively together.


“5 Tips for Writing Meaningful Thank-You Notes” – in this season, let’s remember the power (and joy) of writing a brief but genuine thank-you note. Wishing a Happy Thanksgiving to all those celebrating!

 

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